American Chasers War On Everything
Americans are NOT stupid - WITH SUBTITLES
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
Ph. D. Thesis
The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- J. Frank Dobie, "A Texan in England"
-- J. Frank Dobie, "A Texan in England"
The One and True Polish Joke
A Polish worker walks into a bank to deposit his paycheck. He has heard
about Poland's economic problems, and he asks what would happen to his
money if the bank collapsed. "All of our deposits are guaranteed by the
finance ministry, sir," the teller replies.
"But what if the finance ministry goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Then the government will intercede to protect the working class,"
the teller says.
"But what if the government goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Our socialist comrades in the Soviet Union naturally will come
to our assistance," the teller responds with growing irritation.
"And if the Soviet Union goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Idiot!" the teller snorts. "Isn't that worth losing one lousy
paycheck?"
-- Making the rounds in Warsaw, 1984, during martial law
about Poland's economic problems, and he asks what would happen to his
money if the bank collapsed. "All of our deposits are guaranteed by the
finance ministry, sir," the teller replies.
"But what if the finance ministry goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Then the government will intercede to protect the working class,"
the teller says.
"But what if the government goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Our socialist comrades in the Soviet Union naturally will come
to our assistance," the teller responds with growing irritation.
"And if the Soviet Union goes broke?" the worker asks.
"Idiot!" the teller snorts. "Isn't that worth losing one lousy
paycheck?"
-- Making the rounds in Warsaw, 1984, during martial law
Politics again
SOCIALISM:
You have two cows. Give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM:
You have two cows.
Give both to the government. The government gives you milk.
CAPITALISM:
You sell one cow and buy a bull.
FACISM:
You have two cows. Give milk to the government.
The government sells it.
NAZISM:
The government shoots you and takes the cows.
NEW DEALISM:
The government shoots one cow,
milks the other, and pours the milk down the sink.
ANARCHISM:
Keep the cows. Steal another one. Shoot the government.
CONSERVATISM:
Freeze the milk. Embalm the cows.
You have two cows. Give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM:
You have two cows.
Give both to the government. The government gives you milk.
CAPITALISM:
You sell one cow and buy a bull.
FACISM:
You have two cows. Give milk to the government.
The government sells it.
NAZISM:
The government shoots you and takes the cows.
NEW DEALISM:
The government shoots one cow,
milks the other, and pours the milk down the sink.
ANARCHISM:
Keep the cows. Steal another one. Shoot the government.
CONSERVATISM:
Freeze the milk. Embalm the cows.
Cute!
Calvin: "I wonder where we go when we die."
Hobbes: "Pittsburgh?"
Calvin: "You mean if we're good or if we're bad?"
Hobbes: "Pittsburgh?"
Calvin: "You mean if we're good or if we're bad?"
XFCE4 for starters
Real Programmers don't play tennis, or any other sport that requires you to change clothes. Mountain climbing is OK, and real programmers wear their climbing boots to work in case a mountain should suddenly spring up in the middle of the machine room.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)